my bleeding heart</3

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Updated my blog's song for those awesome readers like you. oh well, birthday is over so i'm here to reflect on what on earth is going on with me for the past 19 years. ~~oh man! i feel so old! :((.~~

Life is kinda shitty but no matter what life still goes on isn't it? we can't control our life but we could prevent tragedy from happening isn't it? everybody had a choice of what they want to do about their life its just depends on their mindset seeing how they would handle when they are in such situation. Nobody could help them if they don't want to help themselves isn't it?

Saw this phrase somewhere ~~but i cant remember exactly where~~ which i feel that it's true as it totally bring out how i feel. Let me share the phrase with you guys, the phrase goes like this 'The greater the love, the greater the tragedy when it's over'. Well, i felt that i'm so much being loved by my girl and i let myself fall into the hand of heartache, and fair enough, my life is worse then ever after she left as i totally lost the meaning and my aim in life. I guess she is the first few girls that i could obeyed and listened to given my rebellious and stubborn character, my motivation to study hard in order to achieve success for our future.

I thought that time can heal everything but i was wrong. Time changed me into a guy that i hated. Ever wonder how could someone hate himself or something? oh well, let me tell you the feeling is shit and you will feel like killing yourself yet you are to afraid to die and all i could do is numbing myself with alcohol and party my life away to the extend that i flunk my 'O' Level .

Well, been having weird dreams lately which make me felt like living in those dream and never to wake up. Been living in regrets but all i could do is to accept the facts that she is gone, That doesn't seems to be a bad idea as i know it is finally time to move on to the second part of my life since i encounter someone that is awesome. i know i will still miss her but i'm no longer loving her.

I wonder if i made another right choice this time round. I'm so afraid to fall hard once again but i just can't help it but to love you every minutes even when you pissed me off. But just somehow you never once pleased me after each time you screw around with my mood. A part of me just think that i shouldn't let such a small things affected us but a part of me like, hey! i'm a guy, why do i have to endure with your attitude. oh well, maybe i should said guy's pride killed!

Despite facing shit you gave me in the past, despite pushing you away, i ended up holding your hand once again and after listening to wadever you said when we are quarreling, i hope this time we could really end up together. i know that its not easy to last but easy stuff wont have much value isn't it. Despite you have such a long history and etc, i don't mind if you really wanna change to be a better person. when i said i love you, i really do. What i really hate is whenever you thought of your EXs it just let me felt that i'm completely nothing compared to them. Oh well, lets create an awesome future will you?

Oh man! first time wrote such a long post. wonder if there is an vocab or grammar mistake. gonna end off with some awesome picture and maybe a Favorite song of mine.

BITCH! What a gangbang!

Culprit that build their happiness on my misery and they are fucking awesome so dont you dare to bully them! OH MAN! A shorty went missing?

and never to forget my love. such a cute couple isn't it? 'BHB'. Times with you had its own up down moment but i just hope you will be there as always.

Even if you are gone but those memories that we created is still hidden deep down at the back of my mind

I finished scribbling at;11:21 AM